Welcome to decentering me
Welcome to Decentering Me.
My name is Tiphanie and this space exists for women who feel the quiet pull to come back to themselves—without needing to have everything figured out first.
In this first post, I want to introduce you to:
Who I am
Why I started Decentering Me and
What decentering actually means
This is the foundation of this blog and everything else will build from there.
Who am I?
The “who am I” question has always been complicated for me. There are so many ways to answer it—your roles, your story, your preferences? If I’m being honest, I’m still figuring it out.
So for now, I’ll keep it simple and trust that as this space grows, you’ll get to know me more organically.
Again, my name is Tiphanie-spelled T-i-p-h-a-n-i-e. When I was born, Tiffany was becoming a very popular name, though my mom didn’t realize just how popular it would be. Nonetheless, she wanted me to be unique so she spelled it differently. Growing up, I was rarely the only Tiffany in the classroom but my name’s spelling always made me stand out.
That hope for uniqueness came into fruition for my mother because I am a little quirky. I’m an Aquarius, so that tracks. I’m also deeply introverted. Even though I host a podcast and write publicly, I’m fairly private and tend to come alive with a small, trusted circle.
As far as likes and dislikes go—I love coffee, movies, TV and anything with alfredo sauce. I dislike feeling controlled, being in large social settings for too long (2-3 hours max, lol) or arrogance (the trait, not the person)
And then there are the roles I play.
I’m a believer. I’ve been a Christian for almost two decades and in this season, my walk with God feels more expansive than ever. I’m also a wife—currently—and I’ll share more about that later. I’ve been married for almost seventeen years. I’m a mom to seven children, ranging in age from six to twenty. And I’m an employee, working two jobs—one structured and one creative because, well…this economy.
Why i started the podcast (and this blog)
I’ll be honest—writing this brings up a lot of “big feelings”.
My husband and I have been separated for the past two years. Two years before I left, I began what I now call my decentering journey—a period of inner work that slowly shifted how I saw myself, my relationships and my life.
This podcast—and this blog—are both the culmination and continuation of that journey. They hold the lessons I’ve learned, the personal insights I’ve gained, and the practical ways I’ve rebuilt—or am still rebuilding—a life I genuinely want to show up for.
I’m passionate about helping women see their potential, especially when they can’t see it themselves yet. My intention is to help women move out of their own way, gently and honestly.
And if I’m being completely transparent, I also started this space so I could stop giving unsolicited advice. I often meet women whose situations feel familiar or who are clearly brilliant but don’t recognize it yet. If I see someone in a burning building and I see a way out, my instinct is to guide them—but I’ve learned that guidance needs consent. This space allows me to share wisdom gained through lived experience, without overstepping because if you’re here, then you want what I have to say. LOL.
I’m not a therapist or a mental health professional—though I am in therapy myself. These are simply reflections I believe may help someone else on their own journey.
What is decentering?
I love words, so let’s start with a definition.
According to Merriam-Webster, decentering means to “shift from an established center or focus”.
For the purposes of this space, that established center isn’t other people or external circumstances—it’s our old identity.
An identity shaped by relationships, experiences, trauma, thoughts, emotions, and the stories we’ve told ourselves. Decentering is the process of peeling back those layers so we’re no longer stuck repeating the same patterns—living the same emotional day over and over again.
In my experience, this journey tends to move through three broad phases:
Decentering
Rebuilding
Reclaiming
Each phase is nuanced, and they can show up in different areas of life at different times. I’ll be exploring each of these more deeply in upcoming episodes and posts.
Decentering in real time
I want to end with a real-time example of what decentering looked like for me—starting this podcast and blog.
I had a lot of hang-ups. Did I need special equipment? Did I need to be an expert? Did I need a polished persona? I also don’t always feel like I come across well verbally—I’m much more comfortable writing.
To get out of my own way, I had to decenter the old identity of perfectionism, self-doubt, imposter syndrome, and procrastination—and choose to show up imperfectly, to do it scared and to take action anyway.
And here we are. And I’m so glad that you’re here. If you are interested in decentering from your old identity in order to build a better life consider subscribing to the podcast and signing up for the newsletter of the blog to be updated on future posts and episodes.
But until then…..
This journey is ongoing, like all journeys. It’s lived out loud and sometimes in the wild. But your future self—and mine—will thank us.
So I’ll leave you with this question:
Are you going to show up today?
